Fun Morning

• Overslept and ended up leaving a little later than I wanted :(
• Got a seat on the subway :)
• Some rude woman was shoving into my leg, and then finally stepped on my foot :(
• I kicked her (not hard enough that she would even notice) :)
• Missed my stop to catch the F train.  Had to take the G train.  Yuck :(
• Made it to my office safely, altho pretty darn late, but still safely :)

Help!

Dear horrible woman in the bathroom who let me choke,

I hope you are deaf so that I am guilty of accusing you falsely.  I can not otherwise fathom how you could possibly hear someone coughing like that, so violently, to the point of vomiting, and just walk out of the bathroom without even saying a word.  All you had to do was ask if I were ok.  I had my water bottle.  I eventually turned out ok.  But how would you know that?  You didn't even ask.  Shame on you.  Is this how you observe bein adam lachaveiro?  By walking out on someone in need?  It is not awkward and it is not violating someone's privacy.  It is helping someone who so clearly needs help.  You should be ashamed of yourself.

Signed sadly,
Choking in the private office bathroom in the stall next to you.

Dear Bubby, z"l

Dear Bubby,
I really miss you.  A little more today than other days.  I miss running to the car all excited when Daddy brought you and Zaida to our house.  I miss making "lakalach" with you.  I miss cleaning your kitchen (and making a mess in the process).  I miss playing dress up in your apt with my special red box of jewelry and the giant skirts that you saved for me.  I'm wearing a giant skirt and big earrings today just for you.  (The heavy earrings might not make it all day...sorry.)  I miss cheating at rummy with you.  Don't worry.  Your great-granddaughter, who is named after you, cheats when she plays with me just like I did when I played with you.  So cheating is still in our family.  Isn't that nice.  I remember watching the "Crosby" show for the first time in your apt.  (Nobody likes him anymore, just so you know).  I remember when Meira and I were (not) sleeping over and you would tell us to sleep "tushy to tushy".  I do not miss that part, but I do miss sleeping over.  I remember one time, I was sick and I had to stay home from school, so Daddy brought me to your apt for the day.  Then I got homesick and cried and you made me spaghetti until Daddy came and took me home.  Then I felt bad that I hurt your feelings by leaving you so Daddy helped me call you.  That was a weird day.  I remember when Mommy or Daddy would potch me in the tush b/c of course I did something I shouldn't have, b/c I was no angel, and you used to tell me to make me feel better that they were just swatting the flies away, b/c you thought I was a perfect angel.  (I was not.  But don't tell anyone.)  I miss you coming to our house for Pesach.  That was my favorite.  Giving out parts for Echad Mi Yodaya.  I always gave you the hardest part.  And you just took it, and laughed - maybe more than I did.  I'm not sure why that was ok, but Mommy and Daddy were laughing also.  I wish you could come to my home now for Pesach.  You would love it.  I wish you could've been at my wedding - in your light pink dress with the empire waist.  I wish you could've met Moshe.  You would love him too.  I wish you could've watched me speak at my graduation.  You'd be so proud of me.  I miss helping you set up the kiddush in your shul.  I remember learning how to put together those plastic wine cups.  I thought it was so cool.  So for about 8 years, I helped and then became in charge of setting up kiddush in my shul.  We didn't have those fancy cups like you had...b/c I didn't have a little helper like you had.  You should've been at the shul dinner where they honored me for a lot of things, but mostly for kiddush.  That was all you.  I think I actually mentioned you in my speech.  You would've been so proud.  I remember when it struck me that I ran kiddush and so did my bubby.  That was a mind-blowing moment.  Thank you for passing that torch on to me.  I'd be a very different person without it.
I just really miss you.  I don't know what else to say.  I just really miss you.

Love,
your Special :)

Change the what?

Last night, we changed the clocks back an hour.  But did anyone actually change a real clock?  Before changing the clocks last night, I looked around my apt and saw the computers and cell phones and router, which all are basically atomic clocks and change automatically, and I asked "Is there any clock here that we actually have to change?"  My husband thought and said "no" and I was a little surprised.  Is there really no more physically changing the clock anymore?  Like no more rewinding a movie after you watch it?  It made me a little sad.  (Then we thought of our watches...and the radio clock in the bedroom.  Phew!)  But what's next?  Not using a key to turn on the car?  Wait...

Future Day :)

Future Day is here!  Yay :)
In case you didn't know, I am a big Back to the Future fan.  Today is the day in Back to the Future II when Marty McFly goes into the future - Oct 21 2015.


A lot of things were shown in the movie that obviously are not real and/or haven't been invented yet - or at least not marketed to regular people like myself.  But the one thing that did happen in the movie, that still could happen is the Cubs winning the World Series.  I've been saying for a very long time that the Cubs have to win this year - b/c Robert Zemeckis and Steven Spielberg said so.  I even thought it would be nice if all the MLB teams pooled together and just let the Cubs win this year.  But they didn't...altho they still could...But I don't see the Mets doing that.  Oh well.
So here is why I care so much about the Cubs winning the World Series this year and not about any of the other inventions in the movie that we don't have yet.
Marty goes into the future from 1985 b/c Doc says he has to save his kid from being jailed.  So he goes into the future and sees flying cars, and hoverboards, and men with two neckties, and Elijah Wood with a colander for a hat.  He's the kid who says about the 80's style arcade game, "You mean you have to use your hands?!"  True story.



But also, Marty sees the news announcing that the Cubs won the World Series.

Here is why that is the most important part of the movie.  Marty talks to this guy and he says "100 to 1 shot" and he wishes he "could go back to the beginning of the season and put some money on the Cubbies."  Then, you see the lightbulb go off in Marty's head with the idea to buy that sports almanac and take it back to 1985 with him and place some bets and win tons of money.  He has a whole discussion with Doc about it.  Of course Doc says no, it's not right, the time machine wasn't invented for monetary gain.  But old Biff overhears them and steals Marty's idea, along with the DeLorean so that he can go back to 1955 to give the almanac to young Biff of 1955 so that he can win tons of money - which he does.  (Not sure how old Biff knew how to operate the DeLorean, but ok...suspended disbelief...)  So 2015 Biff stealing Marty's idea and giving 1955 Biff the almanac is what creates the alternate 1985 to which Marty and Doc return where "Biff is corrupt...and married to your mother...and this has happened to me!" (Doc got locked up and put in an insane asylum).  So now Doc and Marty have to fix the entire space-time continuum.

So the entire Back to the Future II movie only happens b/c the Cubs win the World Series!  If they hadn't won, on 100 to 1 shot, no one would care about going back and putting some money on them, and no one would buy an almanac and screw up the space-time continuum, and then there would be no movie!

So that is why, of all the things that happened in that movie, the Cubs winning is the most important.  And that is why I care so much that they win this year.

Also, it's the Cubs.

Brrr....

I love this fall weather.  But I hate tights and I love flip flops and sandals and letting my feet be free.  So when I put my socks and rain boots on this morning, I kept thinking of this scene from Aladdin, specifically minute 1:03.  It made me sad :(

Nice Surprise :)

Best part of today - It feels like Monday, but surprise!  It's Thursday.  The week is much closer to Shabbat :)

Survival Tip #918

When you go to shake your olive oil based salad dressing, make sure the top of the container is secure and you are holding it tight.  Otherwise, you will dress more than just your salad.  (At lease you won't feel your eye pain.  Always look on the bright side.)

Moving Advice

The best actual moving advice I've ever gotten is to use different colors of duct tape on different boxes and have a system.  Blue is bathroom, pink is living room, yellow is kitchen, etc.  That way, when the movers bring everything into the new place, there is no thinking necessary.  The only requirements are working eyes and not being color blind.  You see a color, you know where it goes.  Genus!  I wish I had thought of that in the 6 other times I've moved.  Alas.  It was super helpful with this move, and it made unpacking soooo much easier and quicker.  We didn't have to open every box to find what we wanted to put away first.  I did the breakfront first.  I unpacked white boxes.  Then I did the bathroom.  Blue boxes.  Etc.  So easy and simple and we are unpacked in less than a week.  Thank you to my supervisor for the suggestion.

However, the very best piece of advice I got while looking for an apartment, that is totally impractical, but made me laugh so hard.  When we were still searching for an apartment, and having a lot of trouble finding one, someone told me "maybe if you shtup the super a little, he'll help you out and give you an apartment".  It doesn't quite work that way where I live, but thank you for that.  And there goes my G rating.

Good News, Bad News...

~ Had turkey salad for lunch.  Yummm... :)
~ Didn't finish till 3pm.  Now I'm fleishig till 9.  Pooh. :(
~ Stayed at work till much later than I wanted.  Very productive, but still very late.  Yay for comp time. :)
~ Didn't get home till around 9pm.  Pooh.  :(
~ By the time I got home, I was already milchig.  Hooray! :)

Survival tip #831

If you're going to give someone you're phone number because you don't want him or her to ignore your call when it comes up as an unknown number, make sure you give them the correct number.  Otherwise, they will definitely ignore you.

I am thankful

I hate facebook.  Like vehemently with a fiery passion.  I hate it more than shopping, which I hate more than root canal.  I hate it for so many reasons.  1. it's such a big waste of time.  2. I got really super sick of seeing everyone posting about their perfect lives and all the things they have...that I don't have.  I've had enough of ppl bragging about all they have and everything that's perfect in their lives, and everything I don't have.  It makes me feel bad about my life - which btw isn't half bad, and I would be very happy with it, if facebook wouldn't ruin it all the time.  So I uninstalled facebook from my phone and I'm trying really super hard to stay away from it.  
And on that note, I will now list things in my life for which I am thankful, b/c this is my blog and no one is reading it, so I can brag about whatever I want and not offend anyone.

1. I am thankful for Tylenol cold medicine.  While I take it, I have no cold.
2. I am thankful for the perfect eggs I had this morning for breakfast, which I learned how to make from my husband, for whom I am always thankful.
3. I am thankful for the fun day I had today at the NY air show that was reeeeeally far away.
4. I am thankful for the 2 friends I went with to it, and to one of them for organizing.
5. I am thankful for the overpriced water for which I paid so that I would not dehydrate, only to get a free bottle later.
6. I am thankful for uniscotti.
7. I'm thankful for a ton of other things which I am too tired to list...thankfully.

Chicken is not the same as beef!

Soo...I thought I'd be so smart and clever and label my food.
Like so:

One for the chicken dish and one for the beef dish.  I thought it was such a great idea.  If only I had gotten the right picture on the correct dish...

Boro Park Jogger

I saw a man jogging.  Not so weird, right?  He had his ear buds in and he was jogging at a jogging pace.  That's how I figured out he was jogging.  I'm not just a pretty hat rack, ya know?  But also, he was fully dressed in regular clothes.  And as one wears in Brooklyn, he was wearing a white shirt, black pants, black jacket, and black hat.  If I hadn't been so surprised, I would have tried to take a picture.

Separate walking?

Today, I was walking between offices in Brooklyn.  As I was walking, and looking around at the stores and other buildings, and of course searching for random license plates, because who doesn't look for random license plates on every walk they take?!  So I was walking, minding my own business, when I suddenly noticed that as I was walking on the north side of the street, there were only men on my side of the street.  On the south side of the street, were lots of women and no men.  I've heard of separate seating, including on a bus, where I also get into trouble.  But can it be that Brooklyn is sooo frum that they have "separate walking"?!

Welcome to my life

I seem to get into a lot of trouble lately.  Get into...cause...it's a fine line.  Wherever I go, or whatever I do, I seem to be doing something with which someone has a problem.  And it's usually b/c I'm a woman, and that person is "more frum" than I.  So I decided to blog about it.  Hence the title of this blog - "The Wrong Side of the Mechitza" - because that is what the tv show/movie/book about my life will be called.
For example, when I was in Monsey for the second days of Pesach, I was walking to shul, and a man, who had been walking at a normal pace, looked at me, and then started to run, only slowing back down to his normal pace after he passed me.  Ok, I was wearing a bright red dress, no tights, and shiny black heels.  Not sure if that had anything to do with this man's decision, but maybe it did.
Welcome to my life!
Enjoy!